Author Topic: eHow: How to Identify (and Ostracize) Harley Johnstone on RawPaleoForum  (Read 18318 times)

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Offline JazzIsGood

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How to Identify (and Ostracize) Harley Johnstone on RawPaleoForum

There numerous ways to identify super-vegan trolls in your online raw animal food diet forum/community, especially Mr. DurianRider himself (or his kinky psuedonym, "Leanne"). These nasty little buggers often show up periodically to express their opinions where they are unwanted. And they can be pretty persistent, or pretty obvious, too. Some of the ways to know whether you've got the most obnoxious raw vegan lurking in your forum include:

~~~

1. They have an Australian accent even though they're not actually speaking. Ex.
Quote
Just me 2 cents
.



2. Defensiveness. Trolls and super-vegans always defend themselves. Or at least ask for forgiveness or ask not be taken as offensive. Ex.
Quote
Hope I didnt offend anyone.




3. Quoting excerpts from We Want to Live or The Recipe For Living Without Disease not only incorrectly, but in an outrageous and exaggerated manner intended to directly smear Aajonus and the RAFD.




4. Mentioning the nutritional content of exotic fruits, especially in specific measurements. A true red alert arises when they claim there's a nutritional label on said fruit.

Quote
As much as us Australian raw paleo's hate Durianrider, I must admit that he is spot on with the sugar content of durian being 27-34g per 100g of edible portion.   >:

I had some organic malaysian durian and I read the pack yesterday. It confirms it and so do all the nutrition websites on the net.



5. Claiming that DurianRider should be respected and given a chance amongst the raw paleo community.

Quote
Just because I dont like someone, doesnt mean I will write off everything they say. I think part of being healthy is having an open mind.

Completely unacceptable!



6. Carbohydrate Romance Novels: Classics. (2010). Vegan Propoganda Publishing. An excerpt:

Quote
I went to Aajonus's talk last year in Australia and he said its fine to eat cooked starches BUT!!!, ONLY if you crave them. The audience was suprised and then AV said 'you Aussies obviously have not read by book 'we want to live' or you havent read it properly!! Please read it over and in more detail and you will understand this concept better'...AV said it all with charm and gently. A lot of us had been trying to be 100% raw and just feeling so weak and depressed because we thought we couldnt eat cooked starches. That night, for a few of that stayed overnight, AV organised some raw honey, organic white bread baguettes, lots of unsalted raw butter. We had a primal french stick party!  AV didnt eat any cos he was violently ill and spent the night in the bath tub vomiting and with diaoreaha unfortunately. We all had our own versions of why that was.

I felt so relieved that I didnt have to be so rigid and carb phobic and now that I eat more cooked starches and less meat, I feel way better off and I have lost the spare tyre around my mid section and have put on more muscle from the gym workouts due to being more 'carbed' up and being able to train harder. Health wise I dont have the bloating and constipation that the low fiber version of paleo gives. High fiber paleo works way better if you want a slim, muscular and tight body.AV said that some people just simply do better on low processed cooked starches like organic potatoes, millet, corn etc.



7. Oyster Bashing. Oh no you didn't, girl!  l)

Quote
Seeker, Im not sure what the oysters are like where you are but in Australia they are really heavy in heavy metals like mercury, strontium. I dont want to swallow heavy metals in my health tonic.

I think its unatural to hold onto to something the body wants to release, and besides, thats no fun!




8. Kinky sex, role playing, and BDSM. I'd like to say I made this up, but I couldn't have if I wanted to......

Quote
Non ejactulatory sex? I kick my partners in the balls if they ever tried that one!   -d

I wont live for ever and nobody else will either! We are here for a good time not a long time!

As a women, I find it very natural to feel a man's ejactulation come inside me. 

Also I learnt that in TCM, mens semen is actually a health tonic for women if consumed orally and not exposed to air or light. If you know what I mean..   ;)

I make sure my men are eating lots of organic kipfler potatoes and flaxseeds (builds semen) a few days before they come over my place. No pun intended.  :)


 -v Out of context, you have to admit that's hilarious!


~~~

Anyway, those are the tell-tale signs you have a DurianRider problem.
As for getting rid of these buggers, I recommend you have your forum follow Dr. Hulda Clark's protocol. Make sure you cleanse your liver and kidneys. THEN, use a zapper or Barefoot Herbalist's parasite formula. (For more info, ask goodsamaritan) Also, make sure to prevent a harsh, anti-vegan environment (immune system) to prevent proliferation of vegan propaganda and disinformation campaigns.


Tips:   
- Don't make DurianRider mad. Not that anything bad would actually happen as a result.  8) I mean, he might "encourage you" or something. I don't know.

Warnings:
- Same as the last one. I mean, he could throw a cucumber at you.  -\ Or, he could make a rhyme about you. Who knows.



Questions and comments are welcome. No vegan propaganda, please. Other helpful suggestions for identifying or ostracizing DurianRider are especially welcome.

"To say of what is that it is not, or of what is not that it is, is false, while to say of what is that it is, and of what is not that it is not, is true." -Aristotle

"A legend is an old man with a cane known for what he used to do. I'm still doing it." -Miles Davis

"Duran always disturbs me. The guy is just weird. Before our first fight, both Duran and his wife gave my wife the finger." -Sugar Ray Leonard

Offline JazzIsGood

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CORRECTION:

Also, make sure to *establish* a harsh, anti-vegan environment (immune system) to prevent proliferation of vegan propaganda and disinformation campaigns.

"To say of what is that it is not, or of what is not that it is, is false, while to say of what is that it is, and of what is not that it is not, is true." -Aristotle

"A legend is an old man with a cane known for what he used to do. I'm still doing it." -Miles Davis

"Duran always disturbs me. The guy is just weird. Before our first fight, both Duran and his wife gave my wife the finger." -Sugar Ray Leonard

Offline wodgina

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Pretty easy when your in the know ;)

Anyway

Genuine RPDers are easy to spot, their posts are intelligent, thoughtful and inquisitive.
“Integrity has no need of rules.”

Albert Camus

Offline goodsamaritan

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Maybe the real reason Durian Rider hangs out in our forums is he is at the breaking point, he has hit the raw vegan wall and needs raw animal food education.  He's just too shy to admit it now while he's experimenting.

Durian Rider and every raw vegan hold out out there I feel are trying to find a way out of their raw vegan rut they need a non-humiliating exit.  Hey, Paul Nison swallowed his pride, eats raw goat dairy.  David Wolfe eats ants.

Don't worry, we won't gloat.

Many of us here tried the raw vegan route and failed miserably.  That's why we're here doing raw paleo diet.

Raw principles are correct, raw vegan would be a whole lot better if you add a lot of raw meat in it.


« Last Edit: March 28, 2010, 03:54:15 pm by goodsamaritan »
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Offline kurite

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Funny stuff and completely true
"A government big enough to give you everything you want is a government big enough to take from you everything you have."

Offline ys

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you know, i find it strange that JazzIsGood knows so much about our forum, yet the name has been registered only Yesterday.  and one of his/her first posts is how to locate durianrider dude.

hmmmmmmmmmmm.


Offline djr_81

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you know, i find it strange that JazzIsGood knows so much about our forum, yet the name has been registered only Yesterday.  and one of his/her first posts is how to locate durianrider dude.

hmmmmmmmmmmm.



I'm glad I'm not the only one suspicious. :)
https://www.facebook.com/djr1981
As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler; solitude will not be solitude, poverty will not be poverty, nor weakness weakness.
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Offline kurite

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w/e
« Last Edit: March 30, 2010, 06:50:22 am by kurite »
"A government big enough to give you everything you want is a government big enough to take from you everything you have."

Offline yon yonson

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people are gullible. im with you ys and djr

Offline JazzIsGood

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Actually, i've been tired of durianrider's childish aajonus-bashing antics for a few months now, and I professionally write for Demand Studios (including eHow.com). So I went ahead and put together this mockumentary of an "article". If you don't like it, too bad. Some people are into slapstick, some people are into S&M. It all depends on your own sense of humor.  8)
"To say of what is that it is not, or of what is not that it is, is false, while to say of what is that it is, and of what is not that it is not, is true." -Aristotle

"A legend is an old man with a cane known for what he used to do. I'm still doing it." -Miles Davis

"Duran always disturbs me. The guy is just weird. Before our first fight, both Duran and his wife gave my wife the finger." -Sugar Ray Leonard

Offline JazzIsGood

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Re: eHow: How to Identify (and Ostracize) Harley Johnstone on RawPaleoForum
« Reply #10 on: March 30, 2010, 07:12:55 am »
Not to mention, why would I drive Aajonus to Ft. Lauderdale International Airport tomorrow from my personal consultation appointment in Delray if I were Harley Johnstone (DurianRider) or any other raw vegan troll.  8) But then again, didn't harley drive aaj to the airport in brisbane?   -\ Oh...... Now I see where you came up with it. Makes perfect sense.  ;)
"To say of what is that it is not, or of what is not that it is, is false, while to say of what is that it is, and of what is not that it is not, is true." -Aristotle

"A legend is an old man with a cane known for what he used to do. I'm still doing it." -Miles Davis

"Duran always disturbs me. The guy is just weird. Before our first fight, both Duran and his wife gave my wife the finger." -Sugar Ray Leonard

Offline djr_81

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Re: eHow: How to Identify (and Ostracize) Harley Johnstone on RawPaleoForum
« Reply #11 on: March 30, 2010, 07:23:21 am »
Not to mention, why would I drive Aajonus to Ft. Lauderdale International Airport tomorrow from my personal consultation appointment in Delray if I were Harley Johnstone (DurianRider) or any other raw vegan troll.  8)
Because it's a story you think would endear you to us or garner envy. Simple diversionary tactics.
Don't take this doubt personally; I've had years of dealing with trolls all over the internet and it's jaded me to new members wherever I am. You may turn out to be legit in which case I'll admit my suspicion was misplaced but until then I'll be quite skeptical of anything you share. ;)
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As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler; solitude will not be solitude, poverty will not be poverty, nor weakness weakness.
-Henry David Thoreau

Offline JazzIsGood

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Re: eHow: How to Identify (and Ostracize) Harley Johnstone on RawPaleoForum
« Reply #12 on: March 30, 2010, 08:06:03 am »
I get it, djr. Ya know, we can't all have a picture as cool as Thelonius Monk as our main profile image.  8) There's only room for one cool picture like that (that is, Thelonius Monk) on this forum. If you'd like to have your own cool picture, too, maybe you should type something cool into google's image search.  :o Then, save it to your computer, and add it to your profile.  ;) My suggestions would be to type in "John Coltrane". They've got cool pictures of him.  ;D Especially the one where he's sitting in the chair with his saxophone in his lap and hand against his chin. Thinking seems to be a cool look.  ;) There's also pictures from the "kind of blue" recording sessions with miles, coltrane, cannonball, and bill evans all together, but they're more historical than cool/well shot.  :'( You can also put up a caveman like Geoff did.  :D Stereotypical, but not so bad.

Anyway, good luck getting your cool picture for your profile.  8) I hope you feel better afterward.  :)
"To say of what is that it is not, or of what is not that it is, is false, while to say of what is that it is, and of what is not that it is not, is true." -Aristotle

"A legend is an old man with a cane known for what he used to do. I'm still doing it." -Miles Davis

"Duran always disturbs me. The guy is just weird. Before our first fight, both Duran and his wife gave my wife the finger." -Sugar Ray Leonard

Offline miles

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Re: eHow: How to Identify (and Ostracize) Harley Johnstone on RawPaleoForum
« Reply #13 on: March 30, 2010, 08:15:12 am »
Actually, your 'DurianRider Mocumentary', although that was how I saw it at first glance, upon reading a second time really looked more like an RPD mocumentary in disguise. Also, you wanted to find out about TD's Personal life on another thread, as if attempting to gather further material for your RPD mocking collection.

Beyond reasonable doubt, I think you appear very much to be a troll, but that reasonable doubt is just doubtful enough that I can't quite say for sure.

Since "..reasonable doubt" has been chopped from the end of "Are you sure..", the jury is still out.

You are innocent until proven guilty, you do not have to say anything, but anything you do say may be used against you in a troll court of law. ;)
« Last Edit: March 30, 2010, 08:26:36 am by miles »
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Offline JazzIsGood

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Re: eHow: How to Identify (and Ostracize) Harley Johnstone on RawPaleoForum
« Reply #14 on: March 30, 2010, 08:26:27 am »
http://huntgatherlove.com/userfiles/image/caveman-large.jpg

Here's a cool paleo picture for you djr. And I' not joking, either. Try it out, it's a cool pic.  8)
"To say of what is that it is not, or of what is not that it is, is false, while to say of what is that it is, and of what is not that it is not, is true." -Aristotle

"A legend is an old man with a cane known for what he used to do. I'm still doing it." -Miles Davis

"Duran always disturbs me. The guy is just weird. Before our first fight, both Duran and his wife gave my wife the finger." -Sugar Ray Leonard

Offline JazzIsGood

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Re: eHow: How to Identify (and Ostracize) Harley Johnstone on RawPaleoForum
« Reply #15 on: March 30, 2010, 08:49:37 am »
Miles, what are you, a pit bull? If you want some raw meat, go to the store or a farmer's market. You can't have a chunk of this primal/paleo dieter, sorry. This forum is no place for childish conspiracies and internet bullying.  8) If you have nothing good to say, then don't say anything at all. And just because others such as djr, ys, and yon yonson (what the hell kind of name is that by the way?) have chosen to each make an ass of themselves, then in unison, doesn't mean you have to also. Be your own person. Not someone else's ass.  ;)

P.S. If you respond as I expect you to (as a conspiring ass), then oh well. Let dogs be dogs, I guess.

P.S.S. Anyone else who feels how "they" do and who'd like to make an ass of themselves/be an internet bully, repeat exactly what djr, ys, yon yonson, and miles said and you'll be in the club.  :o Then, think about how goodsamaritan, tylerdurden, and other highly respected members of this forum view your distasteful comments (by the way, they do read them, if you thought you'd pull this garbage off without losing respect).  -[ Quite shameful.
"To say of what is that it is not, or of what is not that it is, is false, while to say of what is that it is, and of what is not that it is not, is true." -Aristotle

"A legend is an old man with a cane known for what he used to do. I'm still doing it." -Miles Davis

"Duran always disturbs me. The guy is just weird. Before our first fight, both Duran and his wife gave my wife the finger." -Sugar Ray Leonard

Offline goodsamaritan

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Re: eHow: How to Identify (and Ostracize) Harley Johnstone on RawPaleoForum
« Reply #16 on: March 30, 2010, 09:09:41 am »
Topic locked.
Nothing to see here.
Let's move on.
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