These dynamic conflicts of (power and control)(creator and Creation)(Slaves and Masters) have played out through the sagas of the ages, and for those with eyes to see, are being played out right now on a scale and sophistication, so grandiose, it boggles the mind to begin to fathom. From within this wilderness backwater forum; from the tiger eyed view, I sit as a silent (and sometimes not so silent) witness, to this divine comedy; not knowing whether to laugh, cry or scream. If there is anything I am sure of, it is that those wild angels watching over the fleshlings of earth are getting one hell of a show.
This is mostly how I try to see this whole situation. Looking into what is really going on with people, the level of brainwash, the fearmongering, all the systems at play is really awe-inspiring to me. I look at it with great admiration for whomever put it all into play. It did took me a while to be able to look at it this way, and i think somewhere along that journey i realized my life might be very different from what i expected. It might also be filled with a lot of suffering and eventually (of course) death, maybe prematurely.
This is also what Victor Frankl discusses in his "Man's search for meaning" -> to be able to cope with these kind of situations it might be best to look at it as an experiment. Some experiment you can control, like your diet, some you cannot. Either way, if you feel curious about what is going to happen, life becomes more doable.
I share your sentiment about having someone to talk to in real life. I think you are doing good with going to meetings, staying at home you will never meet anyone.
Regarding whether your nose is running due to the shredding work or the virus, Politcal Atheist spammed this forum regularly, with the same post, which contains some good information regarding virusses, illness, etc.
Hang in there, and focus on the things that matter, like your family and health :-)